


Taking Chances

by Zephyrfox



Series: Real Legend [9]
Category: GoldenEye (1995), James Bond (Classic movies), James Bond (Craig movies), Legends (2014)
Genre: Caretaking, Communication is lacking, Drunk confessions, Epiphanies, First Time, Friends to Lovers, M/M, They Get There In The End, dubious consent but enthusiastic appreciation, minor D/s
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-21
Updated: 2017-01-21
Packaged: 2018-09-19 02:33:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,633
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9414188
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zephyrfox/pseuds/Zephyrfox
Summary: James and Alec met in the military when they were young. They spent years working together, and even joined MI6 together. After the disaster that is James' first mission as 007, they find they need to take a chance for the future.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to Jaimistoryteller for encouragement and brainstorming, and to Kryptaria for the loan of Danielle Marsh.

 

_The bitch is dead._

That’s what he'd told M, after Venice. After Vesper. The two were inextricably linked in his mind now.

Why had Vesper betrayed him?

He tipped his head back, leaning it against the wall. All he could see now were the stars, cold and lonely out in space. They had no answers for him. He was alone, and he’d always be alone.

Where was Alec? James felt an odd pang in his chest when he thought of his best friend. Alec had always been loyal. Alec had never betrayed him.

He stared morosely at the now-empty glass in his hand. He needed another drink.

 

~~~

 

Alec stopped short at his first whiff of the flat after he opened the door. The air was thick with the stench of booze and rotting food. He flipped on the light and stopped, appalled by what he saw.  

“James? Are you here?” He looked around warily, unsure of what state his friend might be in, but the flat appeared empty.

It was worse than Danielle had suggested. She had told him some of what had happened while he’d been undercover. It looked as though James’ reaction had been worse than she’d thought — and she’d been worried enough that she had cornered him the moment he returned to MI6 from his mission.

There were old take away boxes among the debris, and he was momentarily relieved at the sign that James had at least been eating, until he realized that they were all nearly full. They looked as if James had only taken a few bites of each before giving up on them. The many liquor bottles were, of course, empty.

His gut clenched when he noticed that the door to the balcony was open. _Ohgodno. James!_ He strode to the door, the need to see, to make sure, prodding him to move faster.

He went through the door and caught his breath.

 _Thank fuck._ He sagged against the doorframe, shaky with relief. James was there, he hadn’t — Alec cut that thought off, with the sudden fear that allowing the thought to fully form might make it come true.

He sighed. He was relieved, but his friend still looked like a wretched mess. Unshaven and rumpled, and a far cry from his normal fastidious insistence on being well-groomed.

James was sitting on the deck, staring moodily out into the darkness, swigging directly from the bottle of whatever-it-was that he was drinking. Whiskey, maybe? He seemed to be ignoring Alec.

At least, he hoped James was just ignoring him and wasn’t actually unaware that he was standing there.

“Alec? ‘Zat really you? You really here this time?” Ice blue eyes peered up at him, squinting blearily against the light from inside the flat.

Alec swallowed. How could it have gotten this bad? Why hadn’t anyone checked — He snorted to himself. He’d be the only one who would care enough to check, and he’d been away on mission. He knelt down beside his friend, saying quietly, “Yeah, it’s me. You look awful, mate.”

The blond head tilted to the side in slow motion, and James frowned. “You answered. You didn’t do that the other times.”

“Other times?” Alec stilled, horrified. _Hallucinations?_

James brought his bottle up to eye level and peered at it for a moment before taking a long pull and emptying it. He set it down decisively, with a sharp click of glass against concrete. “If you’re here, then I can do this.”

Before Alec could think of asking what the hell that meant, he found himself with his arms full of his very drunk best friend trying clumsily to kiss him. _What the hell?_

He pushed the other man away and stood up. What did James think he was doing? He loved James, he always had, but he knew that his friend was _straight_.

James scowled up at him petulantly. “Whyinhell you do that for?”

“We need to talk when you’re less drunk.” He shook his head. “Come on, let’s get you cleaned up and into bed.”

He reached down and hauled the blond up.

James swallowed and turned pale at the sudden change in position. He went slightly wild-eyed and managed a strangled “Al’c,” before pressing his hands to his mouth.

 _Christ_. Alec looked around and saw a box half-hidden by the door and dragged it over.  “Here.” He helped James into a kneeling position.

He grimaced at the smell of used alcohol and bile. He kept a steadying hand on James’ shoulder and rubbed soothing circles on his back with the other.

“Shhh, it’s all right, let it all out, you’ll feel better,” he murmured, feeling useless as he watched James’ shuddering attempt to purge the entire contents of his stomach. They had gotten spectacularly drunk many a time before, but he had never felt as helpless in the aftermath of those drunks as he did now.

It seemed to take forever before it was over. “Christ, you’re a mess. Hey. Can you look at me?” He shifted around to look James in the face.

Blue eyes stared back at him, dulled by exhaustion.

“Want to try getting up? You really need a shower and bed.”

A blink, then a hesitant nod.

“All right, up you get.” Alec helped James to his feet — slowly this time — watching carefully for signs that he would be sick again.

 

~~~

 

He steered a limply passive James through the flat and into the bathroom, thankful that the other man was going as directed and not fighting him.

Alec sat James down on the closed lid of the toilet and watched him slowly lean sideways, coming to rest against the wall.

With a huff, he decided on a course of action. A shower or bath were out — better to just get James out of his shirt and trousers and run a flannel over him to get the worst of the grime. As he worked he found that it was like trying to undress and clean a man-sized rag doll.

When he was done, he manhandled a mostly asleep James into bed in the next room and pulled the blanket up. He patted his friend’s cheek. “Hey, don’t go to sleep yet. I’ll be right back.”

He left the room, going to the kitchen for a glass of water and then returning to the bathroom for the paracetamol.

Back in the bedroom he managed to get two of the pills and most of the glass of water into James. He left the glass on the bedside table, along with a few more of the pills, and watched until his friend fell asleep. Then he refilled the glass and jotted a quick note.

When he was done, he took a moment to look at James. He smiled sadly as he reached out and smoothed slightly damp hair away from his friend’s  forehead. His friend, not his lover, no matter how he might wish for that to change. Then, because he couldn’t help himself — because he was a damn fool — he bent down and pressed a gentle kiss to James’ brow.

Then he straightened up and turned to leave the room. At the bedroom door, he looked back. The water, pills, and note that he had left on the bedside table were where James could hardly miss them when he regained consciousness, and yet were — hopefully — safe from being accidentally knocked over.

 

~~~

 

James groaned. Why the fuck was he awake? His head was pounding, and his mouth tasted like something had crawled in there and died.

Something stirred in the depths of his memory that he wasn't ready for, so he just lay there, trying to summon the energy to either fall back asleep or get up for water and painkillers.

He finally shoved himself — slowly — up, and opened his eyes. The room was dark. Someone had made sure the drapes were closed. He reached out and flipped the lamp on and winced at the sudden light.

That someone had also left a glass of water and some familiar pills on the nightstand. Who? He didn't remember bringing anyone home. He hadn't been in the mood for anything since — he cut that thought off.

What the hell had he done last night? The memory he'd been deliberately ignoring tugged at his attention. A male body, all hard muscle, holding him. He licked his lips, a fluttering, anticipatory feeling in his stomach that turned to nausea when he realized that he'd tried to stick his tongue down his best friend’s throat. _Fuck._ Why hadn't Alec killed him? He wanted to die from embarrassment. Alec had to hate him right now.

He groaned, scrubbing his eyes with the heels of his hands. He was a self-destructive fool, and he'd probably just destroyed the best friendship he'd ever had.

 

~*~*~

 

He was leaning against the wall, affecting a relaxed pose, as the other SBS candidates milled around getting to know each other. He was the only candidate from the Royal Navy in this batch.

A blond young man in a Royal Marine Commando uniform noticed that he’d been watching, and came up to him with a friendly grin.

“I’m Alec Trevelyan. Second Lieutenant.” Trevelyan stuck a hand out. “And you are?”

He took the hand, service pride tempting him to squeeze it hard in a show of strength, but something about the other man’s eyes made him stick to a firm grip. “Bond, James Bond. Sub-Lieutenant.”

“Nice to meet you, Bond.” Trevelyan’s grin widened. “I’m sure we’ll work well together.”

They had. Within a few weeks, they’d even managed to room together. Their SBS instructors had thrown their hands up and allowed the change. As much trouble as the two friends were together, their mischief when they didn’t get their way could be worse.

They’d stayed together throughout their training, and kept in touch when duty separated them. Five years later, they found themselves seconded to MI6 together.

Alec had given him that same wide grin, and he’d grinned back.

 

~*~*~

 

James swallowed as the memory of meeting Alec faded. Everyone left. He shouldn’t be surprised when Alec did. It was his own fault, he was the one that drove Alec away.

He couldn’t ignore the pounding in his head anymore. He scooped up the pills and swallowed them dry, then knocked back the whole glass of water. A slip of paper fluttered off the nightstand onto the bed as he set the glass back down. He picked up the paper and unfolded it, his heart sinking at the familiar scrawl.

 

~ Sober up, then come see me. We need to talk. ~

 

_Fuck._

 

~~~~

 

He sat in the kitchen, staring at the mug of coffee in front of him. It was hideous, decorated with a ridiculous looking stag, meant to represent the stags at Skyfall Manor. Alec had given it to him as a joke, but it had become his favorite mug.

He still remembered the shock when he realized Alec was gay. Bi. Whatever. How hurt he'd been at the wary way Alec had looked at him. Of course he wouldn't endanger Alec by telling anyone.

Then, when he realized that Alec loved him, not just friendship but real love, he'd had a funny flip in his stomach. But his realization changed nothing between them, and they went on as they had before.

When the law changed, and homosexuality was legal in the military, the two of them had gone out together to celebrate. His mouth curved in a rueful grin. That had been an epic three day bender.

He'd hated all of the men Alec dated, but not the women. Hell, some of the women they’d shared. He stopped and considered. He'd always felt smug whenever Alec chose to spend time with him rather than go on a date with another man, but he had never cared when it was a woman Alec was seeing. What was the difference?

He'd been afraid that he was a homophobe, even though he didn't care who anyone else dated. Only when it was someone — some _man_ — who thought they could take Alec away from him —

He stopped, shaken. Was that it? Was he _jealous?_ Afraid that Alec would leave him for another man? He slowly realized that he'd never considered women a threat to his relationship with Alec, but another man was a real danger.

He was in love with his best friend.

He sat there, stunned, contemplating that truth.

He was in love with Alec.

So. What did he want? The answer was easy — a real relationship with Alec. But could that happen now that he'd ruined everything with his drunken behavior?

He took a deep breath. The only thing he could do was go to Alec and beg forgiveness and a second chance.

 

~~~~

 

He rehearsed everything he planned to say several times on his way to Alec’s flat. He would apologise for the night before, confess his feelings to Alec, and they would kiss, and then they’d have sex. He didn’t see any flaws in his plan, but he was still unaccountably nervous as he stood in front of the door, waiting for it to open.

When it did, Alec stared at him with a puzzled frown. “Why did you knock?”

“Because I didn't have a key.”

“Why do you need a key?” Alec sounded baffled. “You can pick the lock faster.”

“Well, yes, but —” He huffed, growing frustrated. “Look, can I come in?”

With one brow raised, Alec stepped back and gestured for him to enter.

He took a deep breath and walked willingly into the lion's den.

He turned to find Alec studying him. He fought the urge to squirm, acutely aware of his appearance. He had forgone the suit his instincts demanded for a mission, knowing full well that Alec would see it for the crutch it was. Instead, he wore jeans and a t-shirt.

Alec pursed his lips, then nodded as if coming to a decision. “I'll get you a drink.”

 _God,_ yes. He needed a little liquid courage to get him through this. He felt like he’d started off on the wrong foot already. How the hell was he going to get Alec to forgive him, and take the chance on them starting a relationship?

He followed Alec into the kitchen, feeling a bit like a lost puppy. He took the glass Alec handed him and took a deep pull, only to choke in surprise. He spluttered, “What the hell?”

Alec frowned at him. “Orange juice.” _Obviously_ was left unsaid. So was _you idiot_.

He made a face. “You said a drink. I thought it was a screwdriver.”

“You’re dehydrated.” Alec rolled his eyes, exasperated. “The last thing you need is more alcohol. Go on. Drink the rest of the juice.”

He scowled, sternly reminding himself of his mission. He loved Alec, even when Alec was being a prick. He raised the glass and took a sip. “There. Happy?”

“Ecstatic.” A smile flickered across Alec's face. “What do you want, James?”

He opened his mouth, intending to say, ‘I'm sorry,’ and, ‘give me a second chance.’ Instead he blurted, “I love you.”

Alec’s smile disappeared, turning his face into a mask of suspicion and wariness.

 _Damn._ He was going to have to prove himself. “I mean it. I want us to be together.”

“What, like a relationship?” Alec’s laugh was full of scorn. “You're straight.”

“Apparently, I'm not as straight as I thought.”

Alec's green eyes blazed with anger. “No? You've _never_ been comfortable with the idea that I date men. Never. How can you stand there and tell me you're suddenly fine with the idea now?”

“Because I was jealous! I was afraid they'd take you away from me!”

“Yeah, right.” Alec scoffed. “You were never jealous of the women I dated, then?”

“Of course not, they were only women! They couldn't take my place with you!”

They glared at each other. This wasn’t going the way he planned. He needed to find a way to break the stalemate and change Alec’s mind.

“Please, Alec.” He widened his eyes, trying to project his sincerity. “Believe me.”

Alec blinked, uncertainty in his eyes.

James fought back his grin. He could work with uncertainty. “Take a chance. We can try a relationship.”

It didn’t work.

“Take a _chance,”_ Alec spat, face twisting in anger. _“Try_ a relationship.”

He didn't understand why Alec was so angry. “It will work. I know it will.”

Alec's lip curled in disgust. “It's so easy for you to say that, isn't it James? You've got nothing to lose, do you? What happens when you realize that you really are straight? You think we can go back to the way we were? Just friends? That's not going to happen. I can't. It will tear me apart.”

“We aren't tearing each other apart right now?” He was going to lose Alec. He couldn't do that. He wouldn't. He loosened his muscles, changing from a combative stance to a relaxed one, and pleaded, “Alec. Trust me. Please.”

Alec just stared at him, then closed his eyes and whispered, “I’m a fool.”

James grinned in triumph. He wanted to hold Alec, and promise that everything would be all right, but he froze, not sure if he could.

He didn’t have to do anything. Alec reached out to hold him, pulling him close, and his stomach fluttered in nervous anticipation.

Alec’s warm lips pressed gently against his, and he nearly cried at the sweet tenderness. This was what he’d missed all these years, not knowing that it could be his. None of the women he’d chased could have given him this. He was the fool.

Then Alec broke the kiss, pulling back to rest their foreheads together, and for a moment they were sharing breath. James reveled in the feeling of rightness.

“Forgive me,” Alec murmured.

He had barely enough time to wonder what was that supposed to mean before Alec caught his lips, pressing hungrily close, and he couldn’t get away but he didn't want to and all he wanted was to hang on as tightly as he could and go where Alec took him.

He was feeling lightheaded from lack of oxygen by the time he realized that they were on the floor, Alec lying on top of him, one hand working its way into his trousers and he was pushing his hips up, into that touch, eager for more, and that warm hand grasped his cock, freeing it from his pants and closed around it and he moaned.

Alec was pressed over him, all hard muscle and male musk pinning him down and Alec would never hurt him, never betray him, and he was finally _safe,_ and Alec’s hand felt so good on his cock and he was coming, and everything grayed out for a moment and then that comforting weight was gone before he could pull Alec back, and there was dampness leaking down his cheeks, and he tried to catch his breath and figure out what was going on.

He managed to push up, and prop himself on his elbows. He was a bit of a mess, he acknowledged ruefully. His shirt was rucked up, his trousers undone and pushed halfway down his arse, and his cock lay limply on his semen smeared stomach.

He looked over at Alec. The other man was sitting back on his heels, an unreadable expression on his face.

He was suddenly struck by doubt. Did Alec regret this? Did Alec still not want to have a relationship with him? It was his fault. He shouldn’t have tried to change things. He’d lost his best friend.

“James?” Alec’s voice was full of caution. “Are you all right?”

It took him a couple of tries to find his voice. “No.”

Alec’s face went from unreadable to absolute stone.

Why? Then he realized, and cursed himself and Alec both for stupidity. “You’re an idiot. You just gave me the best orgasm of my life and you’re all the way over there when you should be holding me, and I’m trying to get my wits back.”

Stone crumbled to something a little less forbidding, then turned guilty. “I didn’t give you a choice. I… I thought you might not want me —”

He snorted. “Yes, you surprised me, but did you miss the part where I was willing and wouldn't let you go? The only thing I don’t want is for you to be so far away. Haven’t you ever heard of post-coital cuddling?”

Alec looked at him in disbelief. “Seriously?”

“I know. Who would have thought that James Bond would be a snuggler? Now, get over here.” He didn’t have long to wait before Alec was lying down, putting an arm around him and pulling him close. “Much better.”

It was a novel sensation, feeling Alec’s chuckles through his chest as well as hearing them.

He hesitated, then said, “You were trying to scare me.”

Silence, then a very quiet, “Yes.”

“I’d say don’t do that again, but I meant it when I said that was the best orgasm I’ve ever had. So, you can do that again whenever you want.”

His pillow shifted. Before he could complain, Alec was leaning over him again. So soon? He didn’t think he was quite _up_ for it yet, but he needed to pay attention because Alec was speaking.

“You are insane, and I love you.”

Warmth burst in his chest. “That’s convenient, because I love you, too.”

Then warm lips were on his, and Alec must have taken the time to shove his own trousers off, because a hard cock was firmly pressing into his side, and his own cock was beginning to take an interest in the proceedings. He grinned into the kiss. Things were definitely looking up.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I love reviews, comments, and any other sort of communication. Feel free to stop in to say hi. You can find me on Tumblr at leavesdancing.tumblr.com.


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